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The Muchness Mama

Forging Warrior Women Who Know Their Worth

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Marriage

The Ultimate Betrayal Trauma Resource Guide

October 15, 2018 By Emily Smith 2 Comments

When you are married to an addict and/or abuser a lot of the typical marriage advice just doesn’t apply, in fact it can be downright dangerous. Tips on how to love your husband more and serve him more can just feed the abuse. For example following the  telling you to never go to bed on…

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Filed Under: Emotional, Marriage, Recovery, Relationships, Self Care, Spiritual, Trauma Tagged With: abusive relationship, addiction recovery, betrayal trauma recovery, emotionally focused therapy, healing from abuse, marriage advice, married to an abuser, married to an addict, mental health, PTSD, relationship advice, self-care, sexual addiction, you are enough

5 Things Sex Addicts Say When They are in Denial

October 4, 2018 By Emily Smith 7 Comments

You don’t have to live with an addict in denial. Here are five of the most common excuses a sex addict on Facebook used to avoid taking accountability for their choices, and why those excuses just don’t make sense. These responses were written by my ex-husband when he was in active recovery. He’s not in…

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Filed Under: Addiction, Marriage, Recovery, Relationships Tagged With: be 100% accountable, betrayal trauma, cheating, denial, excuses, fantasy, lust, men are visual, post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD, sex addiction, women are emotional

Creating and Enforcing Healthy Boundaries in Relationships

October 1, 2018 By Emily Smith Leave a Comment

To say being married to an addict is difficult would be the understatement of the year. Let’s face it, even without addiction relationships are hard work. Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries is crucial to finding health and happiness both for the addict and their betrayed spouse. When I first heard the word boundaries I was…

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Filed Under: Addiction, Emotional, Finding Balance, Marriage, Physical, Recovery, Relationships, Self Care, Spiritual, Trauma Tagged With: are my boundaries healthy, betrayal trauma, boundaries in marriage, how do i set boundaries, how to heal a realtionship after betrayal, how to set boundaries, marriage, relationships, setting boundaries in an abusive relationship, setting boundaries with an addict, setting healthy boundaries, sexual addiction, what are boundaries

What is Betrayal Trauma?

August 17, 2018 By Emily Smith 4 Comments

In my previous post I told you that I have betrayal trauma induced post traumatic stress (PTSD), adrenal fatigue, insomnia, depression, and anxiety. Some of you may have read that and said “huh? What in the world is betrayal trauma!?” I know that’s what I thought the first time I heard the term. Understanding is the first…

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Filed Under: Emotional, Finding Balance, Marriage, Physical, Recovery, Relationships, Self Care, Spiritual, Trauma Tagged With: anxiety, betrayal trauma, betrayed spouse, counseling, depression, EMDR, mental health, PTSD, sex addiction, sexual addiction, therapy

The Five Love Languages | muchnessmama.com | Quality Time | Words of Affirmation | Gifts | Physical Touch | Acts of Service | Relationship advice | marriage | Couples Therapy

The 5 Love Languages- Understanding How We Give and Receive Love

February 23, 2018 By Emily Smith Leave a Comment

Have you ever struggled with feeling like you are loved and appreciated in your marriage, parenthood, friendship, or other relationship? On the flip side have you ever felt like you were showing an overwhelming amount of love only to have someone tell you that they don’t feel appreciated? You might be dealing with a love…

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Filed Under: Addiction, Community, Friendships, Marriage, Motherhood, Recovery, Relationships, Trauma Tagged With: acts of service, big family, five love languages, gifts, mental health, motherhood, muchness, parenting, physical touch, quality time, self-care, self-love, words of affirmation

managing your daily energy reserves | mucnessmama.com | introvert | extrovert |energy draining | energy filling | leaky bucket

The Leaky Bucket-Managing Your Daily Energy Reserves

February 9, 2018 By Emily Smith Leave a Comment

I had always imagined my energy reserves as a big metal bucket full of water. This bucket had holes all over the bottom constantly spitting out water as a small stream ran in. In my little mental cartoon I was manically trying to plug as many holes as I could to make sure my bucket…

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Filed Under: Emotional, Finding Balance, Marriage, Motherhood, Physical, Relationships, Self Care, Spiritual Tagged With: big family, energy balancing, energy draining, energy filling, energy reserves, extroverted, introverted, leaky bucket, motherhood, muchness, parenting, self-care, working mom

My 2018 Word of the Year- Enough

January 2, 2018 By Emily Smith 2 Comments

A new year is a time for resolutions. I’ll be honest, I haven’t made one in years because I know I won’t manage to do it perfectly and I really don’t need one more thing in my life to feel like a failure about. Yep, that’s right, I often feel like a failure. You may…

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Filed Under: Addiction, Art Journaling, Blogging, Business, Community, Creativity, Digital Art, Emotional, Entrepreneurship, Finding Balance, Friendships, Marriage, Motherhood, Physical, Recovery, Relationships, Scripture Journaling, Self Care, Spiritual, Trauma Tagged With: enough, i am enough, motherhood, muchness, parenting, self-care, self-love

Black Friday Deals for Large Families

November 24, 2017 By Emily Smith 1 Comment

When you have a big family you have to spend those Christmas dollars wisely! I’ve put together a list of what I think are the best Black Friday-Cyber Monday Deals for large families. I’ll be adding to this list as I see more pop up, so check back often! 1- Instant Pot- 8 quart Oh…

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Filed Under: Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships Tagged With: best cyber monday sales, big family best deals, black friday sales, black friday sales for large fmailies

muchness | you've lost your muchness | self help tips | become a better you | self improvement | motherhood | finding yourself

5 Simple Steps to Becoming Muchier

July 6, 2017 By Emily Smith Leave a Comment

If you read my first post you’ll already know all about muchness, if you haven’t check it out here. Are you ready to transform yourself into a “much more muchier” version of yourself? Of course the journey looks different for every person, but here are a few tips to get you started on creating your own…

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Filed Under: Community, Creativity, Emotional, Friendships, Marriage, Motherhood, Physical, Recovery, Relationships, Self Care, Spiritual, Trauma Tagged With: hobbies, lost in motherhood, motherhood, muchness, self-care, self-love, stay at home mom, work from home mom, working mom

Talking about Pornography With Your Loved Ones| How to talk to kids about porn | My hsuabdn watches porn | what to do when your child sees pornography | talking with kids about sex | the birds and the bees | good pictures bad pictures | Internet safety

Talking About Pornography With Your Loved Ones

May 27, 2016 By Emily Smith 4 Comments

Let’s face it, the birds and bees sex talk is hard enough. Talking about pornography is even harder. The sad fact is, however, that it is absolutely necessary. In our day and age pornographic images and movies are easily accessible online and children are being exposed to them at a ridiculously young age. It is…

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Filed Under: Addiction, Friendships, Marriage, Motherhood, Recovery, Relationships, Trauma Tagged With: addiction, addiction recovery, how to talk to your kids about pornography, internet, porn harms, pornography, S-anon, SA, spouse supprt, the dangers of pornography, video

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Living life with an addicted or abusive partner can completely destroy your muchness. I'm here to help you find it again. Come join me in using creative processing techniques to heal trauma, find calm in the chaos, and joy in living. Who am I? →

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